When will I learn to be patient?! We talked last night about waiting to test and this morning, I didn't wait. All because I spent hours chart stalking, comparing signs and charts, getting a little glimmer of hope from some charts showing bfp at 8/9 dpo. I have a bunch of 99cent store tests and a crapload of test strips so I poas on one test and two strips this morning. You know, just in case. My gosh that second line NOT appearing was the hard slap across my face I needed this morning.
Honestly, I'm not sure why I tested. I know it's too early. I guess I was just hopeful. Nothing wrong with that, right? I don't feel sad, I just feel like a loser. Like, hello! Why would I expect it to be a bfp so early on? Of course it's because I want it so badly and it seems like everyone else is getting it.
So I've promised not to test until Saturday. Since last cycle had an 11day LP - I'm told it's the same every cycle - I am expecting AF on Friday. I've had a few weird symptoms today but they could be pms symptoms, who knows. If AF doesn't show up Friday, I'm sure I'll be over-thinking (as usual) but will wait until Saturday for sure. Or maybe Sunday. No, it will have to be Saturday because that wait alone will kick my ass on patience! Doubt I could hold off testing for a whole week.
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