My emotions are all over the place. I had a really rough time in the hospital, being separated from E and feeling inadequate and pressure (mostly from myself) to get pumping. I am having the hardest time with breastfeeding, all thanks to my reduction in 1996. Plus being fed a bottle for the first 16 days of his life, he's not keen on a human nipple. I'm not pumping on a regular schedule and I'm barely pumping enough for one meal. At least he's getting something from me but it drives me nuts that it just doesn't come easily. I hate hearing his cries when it's not an instant gratification.
D goes back to work Monday - tomorrow - and even though I've asked him to take another week off, he doesn't feel he should. I think that with the first week of leave being spent at the hospital, he is getting ripped off from a great bonding experience with our son. He's a wonderful father and deserves to be home with him. As a compromise, he did request the next three Fridays off so at least he won't be spending the night up at Camp. I'm not really looking forward to him going to work, mainly because I'm not sure I'll be able to handle the night shift. Sure, I'm more than capable but still worried.
Having a baby brings out the crazy in people! In a good way and in a bad way. I won't go into detail but let's just say the grandparents are lucky they see us LOL
It's been an amazing week home as a family and I'm sad to think that in ten weeks I will be at work, leaving my sweet angel face to someone else. I'm going to try my hardest to not think about that and just take it day by day, loving on my little leprechaun.
1 comment:
Easier said than done but don't put too much pressure on yourself to breast feed. I only breast-fed Casey for three months and some of that time we supplemented with formula and he's a healthy little guy. xoxo
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